i have problems with low self esteem

I don't know what I'm doing

So Im going back to school. I SAID I would major in something with computers. I want to be able to fix them. When ours is acting up I just look shit up on google and manage to fix the thing. I dont know anythong though! All thos jargon. I dont know what exactly to major in. Networking? Information? Systems? I just want a degree so ai can say ai have one and ai want that degree to give me the ability to fix a computer. Like the software side.
Then there are the questions im afriad to ask. Like do I HAVE to take the accuplacer? Im almost 30 people and I havent been to school in a long time. I guess I need to talk to an advisor?
This isnt hard. I KNOW. I'm just scared. Why? I dont know. Like this is kind of a big deal. What if I can't do it? What if Im too stupid? What if? What if? What if?!
The best thing is to get it over with right? I think ill checknout tje practice accuplacer stuff. Maybr call someone anout if I have to do it or not. I think I wajt to take english comp and college algebra. I took those classes a decade ago but I feel like I need to start fresh.
i have problems with low self esteem


 have no reason to be, but I am. I want a nap.
I have hypoglycemia, animia, and hypothyroidism. All of them make me tired all the damn time.
Also im lazy.
I need to turn a new leaf or how ever that phrase goes. You knpw what I mean. How do I get more energy?
Im trying to listen to music more often. That helps. Then there is oranges, or the smell of them is suppose to give you energy. Tea? I have some green tea. That should help. Better then soda. Caffeine isnt that great of a drug as far as im concerned. Doesnt really do much for me. I wish I found something made me bounce off the walls.
i have problems with low self esteem


I think I'm going to school.
I still haven't finished filling out the application, but yeah...
Community college.
That's something.
Life isn'tabout finding ur self. life is

(no subject)

Trying not to be hypocrite. I rwad a book
recently called "Cinderella ate my Daughter". Real interesting stuff. One of the things mentioned was how segregated the sexes are now-a-days starting from a very young age. Because of this it makes interacting with the opposite sex (ie dating) harder when they get older. They are foreign to each other. Anyways, it made sense to me. So here I am outside watching Renee play with 3 boys about her age and it bothers me. There too rough, and they keep fighting, and saying stupid things (like "haha im being chased by a silly little girl) and it bothers me, but it shouldn't... Right. The only thing that keeps me from dragging her inside is watching her keep the peace.

be yourself is the worst advice

Losing Touch with Old Friends

Do you have any friends you regret not keeping in touch with?Paintbrushes


When I had moved I did really well keeping in touch with Ashley. We wrote letters all the time. I still have them stowed away. She kept the relationship going and I just wrote sparingly. Part of it was laziness, and I felt I became less interesting. Nothing super creative, or interesting, was going on in my life. Then I got pregnant and all writing on my end stopped. I sort of forgot about her, and the rest of the world at that point. When you loose touch how do you just get back on track? It seems so easy- just write another letter! But it's so hard. Even years later I want to write, I do, but it never gets sent. What do I say? How do I apologize? What if I seem crazy for writing after so long? What if she's mad? What if she doesn't care? And so another letter goes in the trash. The only connection I have is Facebook and its not like were commenting and liking all the time. Though I got such glee when she accepted my friends request.




American Horror Story

Have any of you been watching these American Horror Story videos? there is like 10 out no and they are really short. The this is they are clues. The are suppose to be about 2 of the characters on the show. This I think is the creepiest clip so far:

So far I'm guessing the chick is pregnant and lost the baby some home. Everyone is saying the latex guy killed her. But I just keep thinking miscarriage for some reason. Anyways, as I watch more clips It makes less sense.
Its got me curious. I'll watch.
be yourself is the worst advice

Music I've Been Listening To Recently

What kind of music have you been listening to recently?


I don't really listen to music much anymore. I keep some old favorites on my mp3 player. IT consist of pop hits that came out earlier this year and some indie songs from a sampler. I listen more to audio books. They've replaced the music listening time.

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be yourself is the worst advice

If I Could Predict the Future

If you were given a chance to know what happens in your future, would you take it?

Psychic Sarah

HELLS YEAH! Why wouldn't I? I'm not worried about ruining the surprise. If it gives me a chance to fix something, I'll take it. If it lets me know how I die maybe I won't be so scared. If it warns me of danger I'll take precautions. I would just prepare myself for good or bad and not let it make me go insane. There is no way I would miss out on finding out what happens in my future. Just ask my psychic!

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